Comments on: “Public Interest” my Arse http://audaciousaria.wordpress.com/2008/09/05/public-interest-my-arse/ The Girl was Brave. Fearless was Easy, but Brave . . .Brave was Hard. Mon, 09 Nov 2009 02:46:50 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: What are You Afraid of? « Audacious Aria http://audaciousaria.wordpress.com/2008/09/05/public-interest-my-arse/#comment-512 What are You Afraid of? « Audacious Aria Mon, 08 Sep 2008 16:17:35 +0000 http://audaciousaria.wordpress.com/?p=592#comment-512 [...] are You Afraid of? After re-reading a recent post & the comments I’ve been thinking about my abuser & my situation. I feel like I’m in a swirling [...] [...] are You Afraid of? After re-reading a recent post & the comments I’ve been thinking about my abuser & my situation. I feel like I’m in a swirling [...]

]]> By: AudaciousAria http://audaciousaria.wordpress.com/2008/09/05/public-interest-my-arse/#comment-508 AudaciousAria Mon, 08 Sep 2008 12:23:45 +0000 http://audaciousaria.wordpress.com/?p=592#comment-508 Oh but apparently I "shouldn't be worried about it" nor even "thinking about it" because it's "not important". "Is it on your mind like?" says my mother. I could just scream! Well not fucking shit sherlock!!! Goddamn it!!!!!!!! Oh but apparently I “shouldn’t be worried about it” nor even “thinking about it” because it’s “not important”.

“Is it on your mind like?” says my mother.

I could just scream!

Well not fucking shit sherlock!!! Goddamn it!!!!!!!!

]]> By: zoe23 http://audaciousaria.wordpress.com/2008/09/05/public-interest-my-arse/#comment-501 zoe23 Mon, 08 Sep 2008 01:30:33 +0000 http://audaciousaria.wordpress.com/?p=592#comment-501 Control....the biggest factor in all of this.... Not only were you hurt, but you don't get to chose how you deal with that hurt. I am so sorry about your family, and I am so glad that you DO have Bear to walk you through all of this. Control….the biggest factor in all of this….
Not only were you hurt, but you don’t get to chose how you deal with that hurt.
I am so sorry about your family, and I am so glad that you DO have Bear to walk you through all of this.

]]> By: AudaciousAria http://audaciousaria.wordpress.com/2008/09/05/public-interest-my-arse/#comment-487 AudaciousAria Sat, 06 Sep 2008 20:28:16 +0000 http://audaciousaria.wordpress.com/?p=592#comment-487 I hope so too, Zoe, I really do. I'm beginning to wish I had never made my statement now. My biggest fear....honestly, I just want to feel safe, I haven't felt safe for a long, long time & I feel safest when I'm with Bear, across the ocean. I am afraid that things might really kick off quite badly.. especially because I'm not a part of his family & therefor, I've always believed that they would think I was lying & would close ranks. I don't feel I get the support from my family here. I wish I did & I know they try... but it just isn't the same as having Bear physically by my side, keeping me from harm, steadying me when I stumble & picking me up when I fall. The biggest issue is the fact that I didn't choose to tell anyone about the abuse. My step-father was snooping & read it in my journal. I've tried again & again to explain to him, my mother & others that I didn't tell anyone, because I wasn't ready. I'm still not ready & I don't know if I ever will be. They tell me I'm in control, but I'm <i>so</i> not you know? Thanks for your comment Zoe :) I hope so too, Zoe, I really do.

I’m beginning to wish I had never made my statement now.

My biggest fear….honestly, I just want to feel safe, I haven’t felt safe for a long, long time & I feel safest when I’m with Bear, across the ocean. I am afraid that things might really kick off quite badly.. especially because I’m not a part of his family & therefor, I’ve always believed that they would think I was lying & would close ranks.

I don’t feel I get the support from my family here. I wish I did & I know they try… but it just isn’t the same as having Bear physically by my side, keeping me from harm, steadying me when I stumble & picking me up when I fall.

The biggest issue is the fact that I didn’t choose to tell anyone about the abuse. My step-father was snooping & read it in my journal. I’ve tried again & again to explain to him, my mother & others that I didn’t tell anyone, because I wasn’t ready. I’m still not ready & I don’t know if I ever will be.

They tell me I’m in control, but I’m so not you know?

Thanks for your comment Zoe :)

]]> By: zoe23 http://audaciousaria.wordpress.com/2008/09/05/public-interest-my-arse/#comment-484 zoe23 Sat, 06 Sep 2008 04:02:36 +0000 http://audaciousaria.wordpress.com/?p=592#comment-484 I literally laughed out loud when I read the bit in your post about "drawing a map"!! I hope the police respect your wishes. What is your biggest fear about starting this while you are over there? Is it about him, and what he might say or do while you are there? Just curious...as you know I never confronted my abuser, so I really don't have any idea what you are going through. I guess for me, my biggest fear would be that if I was not there, the police would some how screw things up...but I am guessing we are beyond that eh? Hang in there. Keep us updated. (as if I have to ask!) Zoe I literally laughed out loud when I read the bit in your post about “drawing a map”!!

I hope the police respect your wishes. What is your biggest fear about starting this while you are over there? Is it about him, and what he might say or do while you are there? Just curious…as you know I never confronted my abuser, so I really don’t have any idea what you are going through. I guess for me, my biggest fear would be that if I was not there, the police would some how screw things up…but I am guessing we are beyond that eh? Hang in there. Keep us updated. (as if I have to ask!)
Zoe

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