Ever had one of those weekends that turns your world upside down? Ever spent time somewhere with people you’ve never met before & had everything you thought you had, wanted & wished for.. change? Ever gone on a three day bender & still feel the high 3 days later, even through the hangover?

I’m anticipating the crash back to earth, but… it really is taking it’s time.

Right now I feel so elated. I feel like I have a thousand bolts of lighting zapping through my veins. I’m on an adrenaline rush & nothing, no-one can knock me.

I’m sort of in limbo right now, as to where I want to go with my life. I feel like I’m at the crossroads. Maybe I’ve already even crossed, I feel like I might even be half way up the other fucking road if I honest.

I’d just like to voice the fact that I am a 21 year old woman. I am attractive, I am confident & I am my own person.

Whatever decision I make on where to take my future, it will be for me, no-one else. I’m tired of doing the “right thing” for other people. There’s no point in it, you get no thanks & you always end up the one hurting. I’m tired of hurting & dealing with bullshit.

I do not want to turn around when I’m 30 & resent everything I have.

I wanted to write this out, but I’m finding it a little too emotional so… maybe I’ll pick this up again later.